Sunday, November 5, 2023

Seeing the Real You at Last

Seeing The Real You At Last
today I have a glimpse of the real you at last
“we know a song about that”
(sorry Bob) in my grief
today you are present in that way
that dead people have
when they have got into your soul
and I comprehend the hugeness of it all
I hear myself reeling off
“my partner died, then Covid struck,
then I broke my shoulder, then …”
as if bereavement was a small thing
(but it is vast)
and at last I allow myself to consider
what my therapist would have asked,
(she, the wise woman who questioned ‘accidents’)
and I see, really see in that
bone-deep, mind-expanding way
that my lack of attention before I tripped,
“doing marvellously” when I had Covid
(the first and second time)
and generally carrying on
yes, stoic(ally), that thing
I never am and wouldn’t do me any good
(and hasn’t)
I carried on stoically,
believing I was still doing really well considering
but putting off the day
pointlessly, painfully, but somehow
always knowing the day would come
when I see the real you at last
(again) and have to grieve





  1. Thinking of you, as always. It's so much to go through xxxxx

  2. Thank you Heather. It is a lot to go through. xx